Here's where you can post your comments about trying to create a balanced life
If all one does is concentrate night & day on one particular thing, you will eventually feel trapped. you will approach your craft with reluctance. A change of pace is the best way to build up your desire & you will work much more productively & actually enjoy it. It doesn't really matter what you add to your life, it will enrich it.
Balancing my life and dancing has always been something that is so important to me. Notice how I separated the words.."life" and "dancing." They aren't the same thing. Many dancers are perfectly fine with wrapping themselves up in a world where dance is the only thing that matters. These are the kind of people who have very few friends who don't dance and rarely care about things that aren't dance related. Although I love dancing and my dance friends...I prefer to have friends who don't know everything about what I do...it makes it easier to be an individual...not a competitor all the time. It is overwhelming to think about dancing all the time and having a different outlet is a great thing. Although dance is what we chose to focus on...it does not have to be an overwhelming force in your life.
It's great that all of you are trying to achieve greater balance in your lives. At the same time, be aware that what might appear to be off-balance to people outside of the arts may work for you. People who feel passionate about their work tend to be extremely focused and don't always have a lot of different interests. Problems occur, however, when you push yourselves past the point of mental &/or physical exhaustion.The trick to creating the right balance is to find something (or someone) that takes your mind off your work. You know you're on the right path when you start to relax and enjoy yourself.
I think it's really important for me to be around people who are involved in other activities besides dance sometimes. It keeps me emotionally energized and reminds me how much I love what I do when I come back because I'm less stressed.
I think relationships are hard no matter what career or lifestyle you choose to pursue. When I was completely engrossed in my ballet career, I felt that I had to devote EVERYTHING to my art. I created a life where I didn't need to find a balance because there was nothing to balance. I never opened myself up to relationships or new experiences because I was 100% devoted to ballet. It wasn't until I made a career shift that I realized I was always hiding behind an excuse. I became available for relationships, vulnerability, and new experiences, and my life began to feel much richer and healthier. I think as artists we tend to have an "all or nothing" approach and we place tremendous demands and restrictions on ourselves. Creating a balance is hard but is something worth working for. For me it has been scary and unnerving at times. I sometimes feel ambivalence and uncertainty in my decisions . These are feelings that are somewhat new to me but I am trying to embrace them, and give myself an opportunity to participate in all aspects of life.
I found that communication is the key. I used to keep everything inside and never tell my husband what was wrong or how I felt. But then I realised he was worried about me and it was not fair to keep things from him. He is very encouraging and we now talk about everything. I realised that he is not going to judge me. I was always afraid of being judged.
As for creating a balanced life, I also find that very difficult. I have many other interests, but I often feel that if I spend a lot of time doing something else rather than concentrating on my career then my career will suffer....I know it's not true at all, but it still haunts me when I'm not dancing or taking class or rehearsing.
Long separations are very difficult to cope with. Absolute trust is almost a necessity or you'll drive each other mad. But even that can backfire - just think of Sandra Bullock. I don't know if there is a solution other than both partners being part of the same group or one just tagging along & that probably wouldn't work. If both parties really want a career, you can't stop for an extended period of time.
I decided to join after reading Jack's post. I dated a musician and it was a drag. I never knew what might happen with all those groupies, although he did seem to love me. Where we went wrong, I think, is to let our insecurities get the best of us instead of trying to set some grounds rules like talking every night. It would have made me feel more balanced while I was stuck in NYC auditioning for commercials. My next boyfriend will either talk to me or I'm not going to put myself out there and get hurt again. You might try it Jack next time you have a chance. It might be easier to resist temptation.
Hey! I've been reading the posts on this forum and thought maybe I could use some help. Balance is one of my biggest problems. My band's touring schedule puts a strain on close relationships. I don't blame my last girlfriend when she broke it off cause there's lots of temptation on the road. I just don't see how to get around it. Any ideas?
I've been trying for years to create some balance but it seems to be all work or nothing. You might think I would take the "nothing time" to chill but it's depressing to be unemployed. Going to therapy helps. I'm also considering training for a different career when this one goes down the tubes for good.
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